Delaney Worrix
Johnathan Maxey
English 1001
30, March 2020
Rough Draft Research Essay
Introduction
It can be scary getting an x-ray done but I’m here to tell you why it’s not. It’s totally safe even though everyone makes them out to not be. X-rays were first discovered back in eighteen ninety-five by Wilhelm Conrad Roentgen. “Working with a cathode-ray tube in his laboratory, Roentgen observed a fluorescent glow of crystals on a table near his tube. He concluded that a new type of ray was being emitted from the tube. This ray was capable of passing through the heavy paper covering and exciting the phosphorescent materials in the room. He found that the new ray could pass through most substances casting shadows of solid objects” (NDT) he later experimented on his wife’s hand. “In June 1896, only 6 months after Roentgen announced his discovery, X-rays were being used by battlefield physicians to locate bullets in wounded soldiers.” (NDT) “The UK Science Museum reports that by 1930, “X ray machines were central to hospital diagnosis,” radiology departments were being opened world-wide and specific training for radiologists and technicians had begun.” What is the point of an x-ray? An article by health line explains “Your doctor may order an X-ray to: examine an area where you’re experiencing pain or discomfort, monitor the progression of a diagnosed disease, such as osteoporosis, check how well a prescribed treatment is working” (Krans) The doctor ordering the x-ray is just wanting to take a closer look inside where they cannot see too such as bones, muscles and ligaments. A few frequently asked questions are is it safe for me to get this done? How does this affect the workers in their health and how much radiation am I being exposed to during this?
Main point one
Are you really exposed to that much radiation during an x-ray? If you are exposed to radiation, then you think you are more prone to cancer. According to the FDA “For example, the radiation exposure from one chest X-ray equals the amount of radiation a person is exposed to from their natural surroundings in 10 days.” (FDA) with this being said we are already being exposed to radiation on a day to day basis not just when going in for an x-ray. We are always being exposed to radiation without even knowing that we are. The FDA states “The average person in the United States receives a dose of about 3 mSv per year from naturally occurring radiation.” (FDA) mSv stands for millisievert. The average x-ray gives off 0.1 mSv. How can an x-ray increase your risk for cancer? According to the Radiation risk calculator “The cell dies (only occurs with very high doses), The cell repairs itself perfectly (most common result) and the cell repairs itself with mistakes (rare).” (radiation risk calculator) So, as you are being exposed to radiation it is not enough to cause health problems, but it does end up killing some cells. However, in the end they end up repairing themselves. “The inaccurate repair of DNA is rare but can cause a cell to act wildly or grow into a cancer.” So, while being exposed to radiation it is rare that it will cause cancer, but it is always a possibility. There are always ways to avoid extra radiation such as asking if you could get a different procedure done such as an ultrasound or MRI. Another way to avoid extra radiation stated by the radiation rick calculator they say “University or Academic Medical centers tend to be more conservative and radiation dose conscious lowering your radiation exposure. In addition, they have more resources available for medical physicists and state of the art equipment.” (radiation risk calculator)
Main point two
A frequent question asked about x-rays is, is it safe for me to get an x-ray done? In this article I’m going to be looking at how safe it is for someone to get an x-ray taken. People often freak out when they have to have an x-ray done just for the simple fact that it is producing radiation. As Brian Krans states in the article “X-Ray: Purpose, Procedure, and Risks” he says “X-rays use small amounts of radiation to create images of your body. The level of radiation exposure is considered safe for most adults, but not for a developing baby” (Krans) so while getting an x-ray done can be scary it is safe but has room for improvements. There are also some side effects that come with getting an image taken. Some doctors may ask you to drink a contrast before the image is taken in order to view parts of your body that may not be easily seen without it. Brian states “In very rare cases, the dye can cause a severe reaction, such as anaphylactic shock, very low blood pressure, or cardiac arrest.” (Krans) While it is okay to get an x-ray done there are room for new developments. Such as how to protect yourself better from the radiation. To fix the problem we need to have better protective gear to shield the parts of the body that are not being imaged. They have lead aprons already to protect anyone that is in the room, but the patient also needs the same thing. Mary Jaklevic from the New York Times states “Lead shields are difficult to position accurately, so they often miss the target area they are supposed to protect. Even when in the right place, they can inadvertently obscure areas of the body a doctor needs to see” (Jaklevic) We need something that is going to shield you one hundred percent of the time and that we know is not going to move. In my next article I’m going to talk about.
Main point three
One thing that is not often thought about when in the radiology department is the affects it has on the workers. Not only are health care workers in this department exposed to radiation but they also can be leaving with other medical issues. As Swapndeep Singh Atwal states in the article “Health Issues among Radiologists: Toll They Pay to Their Profession.” It says “Eye strain or asthenopia is one of the most common eye related problem among the computer users. Its prevalence has increased amongst radiologists due to the increased trend of filmless radiology departments and wider usage of PACS” (Atwal) “Another factor for eye strain is lighting in the room. Reporting rooms should have good ambient light. It should be adjustable and neither too bright nor too dark and should be as bright as the computer screen.” (Atwal) now if you have ever had an x-ray taken you would know that the rooms are typically dark, which also puts the workers in the department’s at risk for eye strain. Another issue with working in this department is musculoskeletal problems. Atwal states “another vexing issue which has shown a sharp rise in the recent years is the musculoskeletal symptoms ranging from low backache to more severe neuromuscular symptoms.” (Atwal) these problems occur due to the physicians sitting at their computer too long without movement or proper stretching throughout the day. One final thing that Atwal talks about that only affects women is that working in this department can be someone who is pregnant. Atwal states “The crucial time period between conception and confirmation of a probable pregnancy, after which the worker should officially be considered to work in a less radiation prone zone, as it happens to coincide with the organogenesis of the fetus, having maximum chance of being at risk of accidental irradiation and all the consequential risk to the unborn child.” (Atwal) The CDC states “Depending on the stage of fetal development, the health consequences of exposure at doses greater than 0.5 Gy can be severe, even if such a dose is too low to cause an immediate effect for the mother. The health consequences can include growth restriction, malformations, impaired brain function, and cancer.” (CDC) now let’s
talk about a few things we have covered.
Refutation
They say that during an x-ray the radiation can be harmful and cause health problems in the future like cancer. I can understand why people think that it can be harmful because it can be but there are benefits. The whole purpose of getting an x-ray is for the doctor to see inside the body to places they can’t see with their eyes alone like bones and muscles. Anthony L. Komaroff was asked a question on the Harvard health letter in which the question was “I always worry about cancer risks when I have -x-rays or airport screenings. Am I overreacting?” Komaroff replied to this question with “We use a lot of x-rays in medicine and in other places (like airports). Too much radiation exposure over time definitely can have adverse effects on health. So, you’re right to be careful, and to ask if you really need a test that involves radiation when your doctor orders one.” Then he proceeded to go into detail on how much radiation exposure is harmful. Komaroff states “The average natural background radiation in the United States is 3.7 mSv per year. A simple chest x-ray (two views) exposes a person to an average of 0.01 mSv, or roughly the amount of radiation you get in a day from the natural background. Dental x-rays are even less.” (Komaroff) We are always being exposed to radiation without even knowing that we are in our day to day lives, such as using our cellphones or even the microwave. How can radiation be a benefit to people? “For many common cancers, such as breast cancer, bowel cancer and prostate cancer, radiation therapy is highly effective in reducing the risk of cancer recurrence after surgery or helping the surgery be more successful. It can also cure the cancer if it has recurred locally after prostate cancer surgery.” (Radiation Oncology)
Conclusion
In summary from the research that I have found, I can now show people that x-rays are not a scary thing because of radiation. Radiation is all around us all the time, we are exposed to it daily and from common things we are always using such as our phones. The NRC state “On average, Americans receive a radiation dose of about 0.62 rem (620 millirem) each year. Half of this dose comes from natural background radiation. Most of this background exposure comes from radon in the air, with smaller amounts from cosmic rays and the Earth itself. (The chart to the right shows these radiation doses in perspective.) The other half (0.31 rem or 310 mrem) comes from man-made sources of radiation, including medical, commercial, and industrial sources.” (NRC) What people need to do when getting an x-ray done is wear the most protective gear you can to avoid as much contact with radiation as you can. Overall, I would say it is okay to get an x-ray just don’t expose yourself to the radiation if you don’t need to.
Works Cited
“A Brief History of X-Rays in Hospitals.” Lancs Industries, 28 Jan. 2020, http://www.lancsindustries.com/blog/a-brief-history-of-x-rays-in-hospitals/.
History, http://www.nde-
ed.org/EducationResources/CommunityCollege/Radiography/Introduction/history.htm.
Krans, Brian. “X-Ray: Purpose, Procedure, and Risks.” Healthline, Healthline Media, 6 June 2017, www.healthline.com/health/x-ray.
Jaklevic, Mary Chris. “That Lead Apron in the X-Ray Room? You May Not Need It.” The New York Times, The New York Times, 14 Jan. 2020, www.nytimes.com/2020/01/14/well/live/radiation-exposure-x-rays-scans-lead-apron.html.
Atwal, Swapndeep Singh, et al. “Health Issues among Radiologists: Toll They Pay to Their Profession.” Journal of Clinical and Diagnostic Research : JCDR, JCDR Research and Publications (P) Limited, 11 Apr. 2017, www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5449879/.
“Radiation and Pregnancy: Information for Clinicians.” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 7 May 2019, www.cdc.gov/nceh/radiation/emergencies/prenatalphysician.htm?CDC_AA_refVal=https://emergency.cdc.gov/radiation/prenatalphysician.asp.
Komaroff M.D., Anthony L. “Ask the Doctor: Should I Worry about x-Rays?” Harvard Health, July 2013, www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/should-i-worry-about-x-rays.
“Radiation Therapy Benefits & Effectiveness.” Targeting Cancer, www.targetingcancer.com.au/about-radiation-oncology/benefits-and-effectiveness/.
“Doses in Our Daily Lives.” United States Nuclear Regulatory Commission – Protecting People and the Environment, United Sates Nuclear Regulatory Commission, 2 Oct. 2017, www.nrc.gov/about-nrc/radiation/around-us/doses-daily-lives.html.
Center for Devices and Radiological Health. “Do Cell Phones Pose a Health Hazard?” U.S. Food and Drug Administration, FDA, 10 Feb. 2020, www.fda.gov/radiation-emitting-products/cell-phones/do-cell-phones-pose-health-hazard.
“Could Your Phone Harm Your Health?: Explore.” Could Your Phone Harm Your Health?| Explore, www.physics.org/article-questions.asp?id=84.
Delaneys Writing English 1001 
1. Read the entire essay
2. Are there any confusing parts of the text? If so, where? Explain what parts are confusing and how the author might fix them.
“It’s totally safe even though everyone makes them out to not be.” I think that this sentence is confusing and should be reworded.
3. Are there any places in the text that misuse or are missing in-text citation (last name and page number)? If so, where? Explain what the author should do to fix these citations.
When quoting you want to put the quotes around the sentence, space, then in parenthesis the last name, close the parenthesis and then put the period. You don’t want your period within the “”. If you follow this rule, all your citations will be correct. You also want to put a comma before you quote something. For example in this quote, “The NRC state “On average, Americans receive a radiation dose of about 0.62 rem (620 millirem) each year” you need a comma after state. I would add a comma to all of your quotes like this one.
4. Are there any places in the text that are vague or need more support? If so, where? What might the author do to fix this section?
I think you need to clarify what your 3 arguments are within your introduction and each main point paragraph. I’m having a hard time understanding what your arguments are until I’m halfway through each paragraph. Try using syllogisms.
Introduction
1. In the introduction, does the author have a clear Hook? What is it? If he/she doesn’t have anything interesting what might he/she use to pull the reader into his/her essay? Provide at least one suggestion for how the author can make this section more interesting, clearer, etc.
I think the author’s hook is clear but I think it could be more exciting. Maybe try asking a question or stating an interesting fact to really grab the reader’s attention.
2. Does the author explain the history of the issue? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? Does the author provide a history of the argument surrounding the issue? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? Does the author explain the relevance of the issue? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? Does the author explain why a unique solution is necessary? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? Provide at least one suggestion for improving or adding to the author’s background section.
The author provides information of how x-rays first came about but not necessarily the issues and concerns about x-rays. The author doesn’t provide a history of the argument surrounding the issue. I think she should include her 3 arguments within her introduction and then give the history on how they came about. She somewhat explains the relevance of the issue when she says, “A few frequently asked questions are is it safe for me to get this done? How does this affect the workers in their health and how much radiation am I being exposed to during this?”. I think she should include more on how this issue is affecting radiology technicians and patients daily. I don’t necessarily see a solution within her introduction. She needs to add this information. Overall, the author needs to go into more detail about the history and issues concerning x-rays. The audience needs some background information. She also needs to add her arguments within this section.
3. Does the author have a clear thesis? Does it have a clear purpose (proposed solution)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? Does it have clear direction (at least 3 arguments)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? Are there any ways the author can make this clearer or more succinct? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She has a clear thesis that x-rays are safe but not a proposed solution on how to make them safer. She does not clearly state her 3 arguments. I recommend she add these and use syllogisms.
Main Point 1
4. Does the author have a clear topic sentence for Main Point 1? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? How might he/she make it clearer?
I don’t believe the author has a clear topic sentence. She asks a question but doesn’t provide her argument or stance on the issue. I would clearly state what you think about the question you asked.
5. Does the author provide a syllogism explaining the logic behind his/her first argument (2 premises and 1 claim). If so, then is there any way the author can make the syllogism clearer? Is there any way the author can/should change the syllogism so that it is logically valid and true? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
I think the author has part of a syllogism when she says, “If you are exposed to radiation, then you think you are more prone to cancer” but it isn’t complete and doesn’t support an argument.
6. Does the author provide support for his/her first premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
The author only gives the first premise of the syllogism. She does provide the necessary information to support her claim.
7. Does the author provide support for his/her second premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
The author does not provide a second premise. She needs to add this to her syllogism and provide the necessary information to support her claim.
8. Does the author explain the implications of the evidence (why they prove that their first argument [reason] is true)? Does the author connect the claim (of the syllogism) to the main point? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this section? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
Yes, she provides information on how to reduce exposure to radiation. I’m still not sure what her first argument is so I can’t tell if she connects the claim to the main point.
9. Does the author provide a clear transitionary sentence as the final sentence of Main Point 1?
There isn’t a transitional sentence to her next main point.
Main Point 2
10. Does the author have a clear topic sentence for Main Point 2? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? How might he/she make it clearer?
Yes, she says, “In this article I’m going to be looking at how safe it is for someone to get an x-ray taken”.
11. Does the author provide a syllogism explaining the logic behind his/her second argument (2 premises and 1 claim). If so, then is there any way the author can make the syllogism clearer? Is there any way the author can/should change the syllogism so that it is logically valid and true? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She does not include a syllogism within her second argument. She needs to add this to make her argument more clear.
12. Does the author provide support for his/her first premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
She does not provide support for her first premise because she doesn’t include a syllogism within her second argument. She needs to add this to make her argument more clear.
13. Does the author provide support for his/her second premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
She does not provide support for her second premise because she doesn’t include a syllogism within her second argument. She needs to add this to make her argument more clear.
14. Does the author explain the implications of the evidence (why they prove that their first argument [reason] is true)? Does the author connect the claim (of the syllogism) to the main point? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this section? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
Yes, she gives multiple facts why x-rays are safe.
15. Does the author provide a clear transitionary sentence as the final sentence of Main Point 2?
Yes, there is a clear transitional sentence.
Main Point 3
16. Does the author have a clear topic sentence for Main Point 3? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? How might he/she make it clearer?
Yes, she says, “One thing that is not often thought about when in the radiology department is the affects it has on the workers. Not only are health care workers in this department exposed to radiation but they also can be leaving with other medical issues”.
17. Does the author provide a syllogism explaining the logic behind his/her third argument (2 premises and 1 claim). If so, then is there any way the author can make the syllogism clearer? Is there any way the author can/should change the syllogism so that it is logically valid and true? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She does not include a syllogism within her third argument. She needs to add this to make her argument more clear.
18. Does the author provide support for his/her first premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
She does not provide support for her first premise because she doesn’t include a syllogism within her second argument. She needs to add this to make her argument more clear.
19. Does the author provide support for his/her second premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
She does not provide support for her second premise because she doesn’t include a syllogism within her second argument. She needs to add this to make her argument more clear.
20. Does the author explain the implications of the evidence (why they prove that their first argument [reason] is true)? Does the author connect the claim (of the syllogism) to the main point? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this section? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
Yes, she gives plenty of evidence to support her claim.
21. Does the author provide a clear transitionary sentence as the final sentence of Main Point 3?
Yes, there is a clear transitional sentence.
Main Point 4 (if necessary)
22. Does the author have a clear topic sentence for Main Point 3? If not, what might he/she do to fix this? How might he/she make it clearer?
She does not have a 4th main point.
23. Does the author provide a syllogism explaining the logic behind his/her third argument (2 premises and 1 claim). If so, then is there any way the author can make the syllogism clearer? Is there any way the author can/should change the syllogism so that it is logically valid and true? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She does not have a 4th main point.
24. Does the author provide support for his/her first premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
She does not have a 4th main point.
25. Does the author provide support for his/her second premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
She does not have a 4th main point.
26. Does the author explain the implications of the evidence (why they prove that their first argument [reason] is true)? Does the author connect the claim (of the syllogism) to the main point? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this section? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She does not have a 4th main point.
27. Does the author provide a clear transitional sentence as the final sentence of Main Point 3?
She does not have a 4th main point.
Refutation:
28. Does the author provide an objective explanation of any counter positions/solutions? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this? Are there any ways that the counter positions could be made clearer? Are there any counter positions the author might have missed? Are there any ways to develop this section more fully? Does the author explain places where the opposing argument is valid? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She only provides a counterargument for one of her claims. She addresses the counterargument and them explains why her argument makes more sense. She still needs to address the counter arguments of her other 2 claims/arguments and give explanations for each.
29. Does the author explain why the counter position(s) is/are wrong using a clear syllogism? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this?
She does not clearly explain why her counter positions are wrong because she did not include a syllogism. She needs to include a syllogism to differentiate between her arguments and counterarguments.
30. Does the author provide support for his/her first premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
No, she doesn’t provide a syllogism.
31. Does the author provide support for his/her second premise (of the syllogism)? If not, what might he/she do to fix this (What support would make this section clearer or more developed?)? Provide at least one suggestion.
No, she doesn’t provide a syllogism.
32. Does the author explain the implications of the evidence (why they prove that the counter position(s) are wrong)? Does the author connect the claim (of the syllogism) to the overall argument (of the essay)? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this section? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
Yes, she gives evidence to prove her first counterargument wrong. She still needs to address her other 2 arguments and counterarguments using syllogisms.
Conclusion
33. Does the author restate his/her main ideas clearly? Is there anything the author might do to better summarize his/her main arguments? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She only really states one of her main ideas which is x-rays aren’t as scary as people make them out to be. I think she could add and summarize her main arguments within her conclusion.
34. Does the author provide a clear application section – that is, does the author clearly explain (1) who is affected by the solution, (2) how the solution affects the audience, (3) what the positive effects are, and (4) what the negative effects may be? If the author has not included all of this information, then what is missing? If the author has included all of this information, then what might the author do to make this section clearer or more developed (what other effects, audiences, etc. might there be)? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
She doesn’t necessarily provide a solution. She first needs to add this and then show how it affects her audience and what the positive and negative effects are.
35. Does the author provide a clear indication of the benefits of the solution? If not, then what are some benefits the author might include? Provide at least one suggestion.
The author doesn’t provide a solution so its hard for me to indicate the benefits.
36. Does the author provide specific steps that the audience should follow to solve this issue? If not, then what might he/she do to fix this section? Are there any steps that the author may not have accounted for? If so, what are they? Provide at least one suggestion for revision.
The author doesn’t provide a solution so I don’t see steps the audience should follow to solve the issue. She needs to state the problem and solutions.
37. Does the author effectively conclude the essay? If so, what makes the conclusion effective? If not, then what might he/she do to more effectively conclude this essay?
Yes.
Works Cited Page
38. Does the author have a works cited page? If so, does he/she have at least 10 sources? If not, how can he/she fix this?
Yes.
Overall
39. Are any parts of the essay lopsided? (For instance, does main point 1 have more evidence or a longer paragraph than main point 2?) How can the author fix this?
No, it’s all about equal. But I think she could add more to each section to support her claims.
40. Are there any other comments or concerns you have with this essay? Provide at least 2 suggestions for how the author might add length to his/her essay.
Overall, the author needs to clearly indicate her arguments and counterarguments within her essay. It’s hard to follow along not knowing where she stands on the issue. This will add length to her essay and give her more to write about.
41. List at least 1 place where the author can add content (length) [more evidence, examples, detail, support, etc.].
I think the author could add more information in her conclusion.
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